I was in love with the boy. I’m obsessed with the man.
Logan is my older brother’s best friend.
My teenage years were spent dreaming about our future together.
He taught me how to kiss. He stayed up late with me while I studied. He escorted me to the prom.
But he is one of the Screw Crew and they only have one rule. I’m off limits.
I went to college and he started working. The secret messages stopped and I lost my first love before it even had a chance.
I’ve spent the past four years trying to forget the only man I’ll ever love. Just as I start to make a life for myself, guess who comes barging back into my life?
Feeling dejected I walk to my room. I hate being the odd one out. Nicole didn’t stop gushing about her first kiss with Derek. Soon all the girls were comparing their kissing experiences and all I could do was hope no one would notice that I had nothing to say.
“Hey, did you have a bad day?”
My head snaps up at hearing Logan’s question. My heart skips a beat like it always does whenever he’s around.
“It’s nothing. Did you all skip class again?” I ask, wondering why they’re here so early on a Friday afternoon.
“No, it was cancelled. There’s a game tonight.” Logan tilts his head and his eyes search my face. When he looks at me like that I can almost pretend he might see the real me. “Want to talk about it?”
I want to talk to him but not about what happened today, so instead of answering I just shrug. I walk into my room and drop my bag on the floor.
Logan comes in and I’m surprised when he sits down on my bed. Suddenly I’m nervous as hell and all I can do is stand like a pillar of salt while awkwardly wondering if he would think it’s weird if I sit next to him.
“Talk to me, Mia. I might be able to help and worse case I can listen.”
My thoughts go back to how stupid I felt while the girls were all laughing.
Secure in the knowledge that Logan has no idea how I feel about him, I look down at my feet and mumble, “I haven’t kissed anyone yet and today all my friends were talking about their first kisses. It felt like …” I let the words trail away, too embarrassed to continue.
“You felt like?” Logan stands up and walks to where I am. When I don’t answer him, he gently places a finger under my chin and lifts my face so I have to look at him.
“It felt like …” I swallow hard, feeling more sad than embarrassed that I’m having this conversation with Logan. “I’m fat and ugly. I know that’s why none of the guys will even look at me. Today it just felt like it was out there for everyone to see.”
Logan leans around me and he shuts the door. I glance at the closed door and then look back to him, a thankful smile on my face. I didn’t even think about the other guys being in the house. I don’t want them to hear about my day.
When Logan tucks some hair behind my ear my heart flutters. I have such a huge crush on him.
“You’re not fat and you sure as hell aren’t ugly, Mia.”
I try to keep the smile on my face and nod. Of course, he’ll say that. I’m Rhett’s baby sister.
“Don’t do that.” He brings both his hands to my neck and with his palms he nudges my jaw so I’ll look up again.
“It’s okay. It just sucks that I don’t know how to kiss. What if I meet a guy who wants to kiss me and I mess it up?”
“Is that what’s really bothering you?”
He’s so patient with me that it warms my heart.
“Yeah. I don’t want to look like an idiot.”
I can see he’s thinking hard about something, but I’m not complaining because his hands are still on my neck. I love it when he touches me. I resist the urge to close my eyes so I can just bask in the feel of his hands on me.
“Do you want to learn how to kiss?”
I think about his question, not sure what he’s actually asking me.
“It’s not like I can go for lessons somewhere,” I whisper.
“I can show you.”
For a second I can only stare at him. Did he just offer to teach me how to kiss? I have to remind myself to breathe as excitement rushes through my body.
I nod and almost stutter, “Would you be okay with that?” I’m so thankful when the words come out sounding normal.
He drops his hands from my neck and smiles. It’s not his usual friendly smile. This time there’s a softness to it that actually makes me feel more nervous.
“Of course I’m okay with it.”
Duh … I want to kick myself. Logan’s just offering to help because he’s friends with Rhett. It’s not like it means anything to him. It doesn’t stop me from feeling excited. Even if it means nothing to him, it will still be a dream come true for me.
When he takes a step closer to me and places a hand on the back of my neck, my mouth instantly goes bone dry. My whole body tenses as I wait for his next move.
“It’s normal to feel nervous when you’re about to kiss someone for the first time, but try to relax. If you worry too much about it you’ll end up missing out on the whole experience.”
I nod, unable to form any coherent words right now.
Tilting his head to the right, he leans closer until I can feel his breath on my lips. I stop breathing and stare at his mouth as if it holds the answer to all the mysteries of the universe.
My insides are quivering with nerves and I can feel my hands shaking. My heart is beating so loudly it’s all I can hear.
Slowly he closes the distance until his lips press softly against mine. Everything stops. The loud thumping in my ears, the quivering inside of me, and even the shaking of my hands. There’s only the perfect silence surrounding us as I feel the warmth of his lips on my own.
I jerk when I feel his tongue on my bottom lip. I didn’t expect it and I flush bright red when he pulls away from me.
“I’m sorry,” I blurt out, both embarrassed and sad that I ruined the moment.
Logan shakes his head as a sexy smile plays around his mouth.
“There’s nothing to be sorry about,” he says in a low tone that makes the quivering return with force. “This time open your mouth slightly and focus on what I do.”
Again I can only nod, ecstatic that he’s going to kiss me again.
This time he moves much quicker. He brushes his lips against mine as he takes a step that presses his body right up against me. It’s a sensory overload as I try to take in what his body and mouth feel like all at once.
His tongue traces my bottom lip again and I almost don’t remember to open my mouth. When my lips part he slips his tongue into my mouth and it makes tingles explode in my stomach. It’s so overwhelming that I can’t focus on anything.
He starts to caress my tongue with his own which makes my hands grab at his sides so I have something to hold onto or else I’ll drop to the floor.
Softly, he bites my bottom lip and I take a shuddering breath in response to the incredible feelings engulfing every part of me.
He brings his other hand to my jaw and with his body he pushes me back until I’m up against the wall. This time when his tongue slips into my mouth, I’m not as overwhelmed and I try to mimic his movements.
Soon I’m so lost in kissing Logan that I forget it’s not real. I move one hand up his body until I reach his neck, and I drink in the feel of his skin under my fingertips. This moment is everything … it’s heaven.
It’s over too soon as he starts to pull away, pressing one last soft kiss to my tingling lips.
He pulls me into a tight hug and whispers, “You’re beautiful, Mia, and you’re going to make some lucky bastard very happy.”
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